September 2011
Right now....
Let’s see, I’m running around in time to get home and sleep to wake up and do it again.
Do I remember when I could come home and just chill?
“Time is an equal opportunity employer. Each human being has exactly the same...”
– Denis Waitley (via middlenameconfused)
YNK
I am not mad.
I knew it.
I didn’t know when, but you both tested me, and obviously I failed…
But I did know.
I realize I don’t mind what you do, I care about you, but your choices there will only affect the girl you are going to marry.
Not me.
I was disappointed that you both lied to me… For awhile as well.
Honesty is all I want, even if it hurts at first.
It’s like a...
Oops...
No one has asked me this question in a very long time…
“who do you like right now?”
Bah! How do you answer that? I never answer that… That answer is kept very close to my chest. But I let out more info than I intended to a couple friends… I do like someone.
It doesn’t matter who I like… I would not do well in a relationship right now, and God has not...
Woah...
So, God is awesome. And I’m seeing how awesome He is in the little ways.
I should be freaking out, I’m not. I should be 100% broke, I’m not. I should not be doing what I’m doing, I am.
Crazy things. Life has turned into something very different.
YNK
I figured it out. And I do not think less of you. I never would. Everyone has things that they struggle with. This is no different.
Iloveyou, you are still a close friend.
Today...
Today was really odd. Things happened really fast. I found a way to make some cash fast, hung out with some amazing kids, and helped to implement a new program at my church. I think it could be a lot of fun.
While I was at the “Second Service” at my church, I realized the thing I was forgetting the most. I need to focus on God. I mean, sure, I haven’t forgotten about Him at...
Do you ever feel like you're just stumbling...
I do.
Typical Weekend
Hanging with my dad, watching movies and doing homework.
I really hope this does not become typical… I actually have not done much.
YNK
I need you now more than I ever have. We both did not realize it would happen…
“Brenda Jones is always right. It’s kind of just a fact of life.”
– My friend… Interrupting her conversation to make this point clear for the girl I am talking to.
How many...
…people think they know the real me?
…people asked me about my status?
…times have any of them ever knew my honest feelings so obviously?
…times did I have to explain this?
Stop guessing… If you know me, you know you got it wrong…
“All that I know is that I don’t know how to be something you miss”
– T. Swift- “Last Kiss”
Fear
Fear is officially the worst thing in the world. I read somewhere that “fear does not prevent death, it ends life.” it was something like that.
I totally agree. I use to think I was a semi legit chic with only three fears. Now, for some reason, I am terrified of so much more. This sounds so cliche but I’m scared of fear. Recently it has gripped my life and has held in in stand...
First time for everything?
I’ve never been terrified if sleeping before…
YNK
Thank you for calming me down.
I totally had a meltdown.
Dare to fail…
1 fear. #1 thing holding me back.
And I need you to tell me it’s all okay, and you got my back whether I fail or not.
God’s got my back… Now trust it?
“This is a path of letting go
So there will be room to live
If we hold on to...”
– Lao-Tzu, Tao Te Ching (A Path and a Practice)
“You do care. You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with...”
– Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling (via quote-book)
“Most people don’t know what they want or feel. And for everyone, myself...”
– J. Cassavetes (via echomi) 